First, let me explain that the dogs, turtles and fish are all fed before I begin to cook, so it's not as if they are starving. They should be full and content, but I swear that as soon as it looks like I'm even going near the stove the dogs spring into action and begin the "dance of disobedience" around me.

I tell them to go lay down. And to be fair they do listen at first, but within minutes they're back, sitting right in front of the TOP, 1:12 Lhasa Apso dogs by CDHM Artisan Lucy Maloney
RIGHT, 1:12 carved Boxer by CDHM Artisan Linda Master cabinet where I keep the roasting pan.

"Okay, now move... Move... MOVE!"

I yell at them, immediately feeling bad because I lost my temper (but I do manage to get the pan out). Now, however, post-pan removal one dog is positioned in front of the fridge, the other by the sink. I'm being tag-teamed by canines!

So I say, "place" which sends them back to the opposite end of the kitchen, leaving me with enough room to move around. I begin to dice some carrots, then turn to get the celery and almost topple over because both dogs have snuck behind me just waiting for a morsel to drop from the countertop.

"C'mon girls, get out of my way!" I plead.